Confessions of an Ex-Racist Christian

This morning I woke up and felt led to open one of my journals. As I read it, I laughed at a few of my foolish request, and I smiled at my growth as a human trying to learn how to live this life. Since it is  Throw back Thursday, I will share an entry of Introspection from September 9, 2015:

I believe one of the hardest thing for a person to admit,especially a Christian, is he or she is a racist. No one who claims to love God wants to admit they have a problem with His creation; but it is  part of the Church’s reality. It took me roughly 25 years, six years ago, to admit racism lived in my heart. It was something I tried to ignore, but, living in the South and becoming more aware of the injustices of my tribe, I found myself HATING white people. I  found it difficult to admit my racism because I had friends I genuinely cared about although I could care less about their kind. To my credit, I did not hate my friends just all of the “other” white people smh… I figured, if I refrained from watching slave movies that it would go away. I thought, if I tried harder to befriend them that it would go away. I assumed, if I tried to replace negative thoughts about them with good ones my problem would be fixed. Oh how I assumed incorrectly! The more I attempted to fix a heart issue with my logic, I despised them more. Finally, I had a moment of truth with God because the hate in my heart was conflicting with the cry of my heart to love him and his people.  I poured my heart out to Him concerning the matter. I confessed that I was in fact a racist, and I held deep hate in my heart towards Caucasians. I confessed that my knowledge of how their ancestors treated my tribe and how some treat us today makes it difficult to forgive and love them. I even admitted that I felt I had both the right and plenty of reasons to stay angry with them. I repented for claiming to love God and hate his creation. I knew I could not be an effective dispenser of God’s love to the world with this kind of hate in my heart towards people. I asked God to change my heart and teach me how to gather knowledge without hate being attached to it. When I decided to be honest about the condition of my heart, God did an amazing work in it. I no longer carry that Hate I did towards my lighter brothers and sisters. I stopped  accusing them all of being one way based on the actions of a few. I truly make a conscious effort to judge a person by the content of their character and not the color of their skin. Life has truly been much sweeter with hate out of my heart. Thank you God for helping me!-Charity

For those who will read this, particularly those who claim to be Christians, please consider your ways.  Take the time to tell God how you truly feel about certain groups of people. 1 John 4:20 says, “If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a Christian brother or sister, that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see?” My encouragement to each of us is to be honest about who we are in God’s presence so that we can love as God commands us. We as believers cannot expect the condition of the world to change when we refuse to change and deal with the hate in our hearts. I am praying for each us that we would truly allow the love of God to permeate our hearts and be the change this world needs. Thanks for reading!-Charity Israel

Single Women, Can We Talk???

Hey ladies, I hope you are having a lovely day. I come in peace. 😇 Yesterday, I wrote a blog to the Single Men enlightening them on how to keep the interest of a Good woman. I think it is only fair that I write to the women who desire to keep a good man’s interest. This blog comes from a place of both love and lovebeachesfrustration because I am tired of my girlfriends being single; and I am tired of them doing stupid things to lose quality men. I get nauseated every time I hear women say, “There are no good men out there.” Earth to ladies: DO NOT DISCREDIT  ALL MEN BASED ON THE KIND OF MEN YOU KEEP CHOOSING. If you were more selective instead of desperate, men of substance would make themselves available to you; but I digress. Here are five things that will keep him interested:

  1. Go out. I have lost count of how many women I have met who desire a relationship but refuse to go out. 👀 Ladies for 99.99% of us, Prince Charming is not going to show up at our doorsteps to whisk us away on his horse. You have to be visible for him to see you, GET OUT OF THE HOUSE!!! I am not suggesting go to a bar, but frequent the places that reflect you and what you enjoy doing. If you meet someone while enjoying what you love to do, there will not be any pressure to stop doing it. This also gives you a topic of discussion once he decides to call. #Outthehousecampaign2015
  2. Be Feminine. Being a lady is a lost art in our society. Women have become so bent on proving they are equal to men that we have lost the “sugar, spice, and all things nice that little girls are made of.”  NEWSFLASH: SMILING WON’T KILL YOU AND BEING KIND WON’T HURT YOU. A good man adores the soft and feminine things about a woman.  He appreciates when we are gentle, reserve, and soft spoken in his presence. A good man will honor and love the feminine side of you. He will not abuse it. He does not see it as weakness. It is simply one of the many reasons why he chooses to protect, honor, and respect you. #hisflower
  3. Have Goals/Hobbies. A good man likes a woman about her business. He is not insecure requiring you to be at his beckoning call. He enjoys the fact you have interest outside of him. He also will be an accountability partner as it pertains to achieving your goals. He will not accept complacency or mediocrity from you because your success becomes his success. Your looks may attract him, but your ambition will keep. #findsomethingtodo
  4. Allow him to lead. A good man takes pride in being the source all of you need. Give him access to the areas you could use his help, guidance, and expertise. He lives to show you that he can be trusted. He takes delight in knowing he can soothe your worries and calm your fears. Your independence will keep you alone. If he has proven himself capable of leading you guys, LET HIM OR LOSE HIM. #TeamInterdependent
  5. Keep his secrets. Ladies his fears, failures, and insecurities are not topics for public discussion among friends. He has entrusted you with the deepest part of his heart, KEEP YOUR MOUTH CLOSED. His secrets should NEVER be used as the closing statement to win an argument. Throw his past or insecurities up too many times, and you will trade in his trust for a stroke to your ego. He will not stay long because part of him respecting you is measured by how much he trust you. A good man values loyalty, and your inability to keep secrets proves YOU ARE NOT LOYAL. #caseclosed

It is my hope that this was received in love. Honestly, I am tired of good people being single for silly reasons. Ladies it is not enough that we desire love, but we must know how to respond to it when it finds us.  Start going out again!  Take pride in being a woman by sharing your softer side with him. Before he makes his arrival, have some other interest and goals outside of Love. Do not be afraid to follow the leader. He has your best interest at heart, trust him. Last but not least, let his secrets and insecurities find refuge in you. Practice silence when it comes to the intimate things of your relationship. All the best to each of you!- Charity Israel



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