How to Make Your Dreams Come True: Five Lessons from Watching Kevin Durant

I will be the first to admit that I am not a huge fan of the game known as Basketball, and I will also admit that I could care less about who wins or loses the NBA Finals. However, I do stay in the loop of things for conversation purposes. I never want to be the lady that is clueless when people are talking sports. With that being said, I remember the rage that was shown by Oklahoma fans around the country when Kevin Durant announced he was headed to Cali. He left his royal throne in Oklahoma and settled for being on the King’s (Steph Curry) Advisory Board. Many called Durant a traitor. In their loyalty as a fans, they failed to see the NBA as the business that it is and “loyalty” is not a business practice of the organization. Kevin made a decision to do what would make his dream come true. Watching Kevin Durant’s transition in the last year has provided me with some nuggets for life. Here they are:
1. Never forget the vision. Last night KD shared during a Postgame interview that he told his mom at eight years old that he would win a NBA Championship. Since the age of eight, he saw himself as an NBA Championship winner. Although, a team would be required to win a championship, it was a PERSONAL goal for Durant. No matter how much success you are having in a place, if it keeps your from the vision for you life, leaving is necessary.

2. Be courageous enough to make the move. Kevin Durant took the same heat that any great player takes when opting to leave a team. The same people who praised him quickly turned into persecutors as he chose to play for a better team. With all that would be said about him, he packed his things and left in hopes of fulfilling the vision he had for his career. Your next move may leave you in the hands of persecutors for a moment, but the reward will outweigh their words.

3. Take Humility with You. There is no way that Golden State Warriors would be 2017 NBA Champions if Kevin Durant chose to be a thorn in the flesh of GSW instead of a team player. He could have made things about himself, but he got with the GSW program and added to their greatness. With every great move you make in life, take humility with you. Be willing to adjust, learn, and add to the greatness of the people you are serving.

4. Loyalty at the cost of your life’s vision is death. Kevin Durant gave nine seasons to OKC before deciding to go to Golden State. Nine years of his life was devoted to a team that he tried to ensure a NBA Championship, and it did not happen. There are some places and people that you cannot afford to remain loyal to solely based off the principle of loyalty. Kevin Durant gave all he could to OKC, and it was in his best interest to try to win with another team. When choosing to be loyal, one must ask themselves, “Would this decision cause me to forfeit my dreams?” If the answer is “yes,” you may need to reconsider the decision. Life without fulfilling your dreams is a slow and painful death that you have chosen for yourself.

5. Everyone won’t appreciate your accomplishment. As previously stated, the man gave nine years of his life to OKC, and he was absolutely deserving of winning MVP last night. However, some of the “crabs in the bucket” could not get pass the route he had to take to accomplish his dreams; or they could not get pass his hair being uncombed during a basketball game. Side note: He’s a millionaire, do you really think a haircut is beyond his reach? Back to the topic, there will be people during your moments of victory that will focus on everything except the effort you put into accomplishing your dreams. To that I say, let them enjoy their misery as you partake in enjoying the fruit of your labor.

There are many more things that could be said, but I  am tired of typing. I will say this, please do not be afraid to do what it takes to accomplish your dreams. As long as your decisions are producing peace in your life, continue on that path. People may not understand every decision you make, and that’s okay. People will go back and forth with their praise and criticism of you. KEEP GOING!!! No matter what keep the vision in front of you. It is your roadmap to keep you on course when comfort tries to convince you to become stagnant. Your life is a summation of all the choices you have made, and at any moment you can choose to change its course. Why settle for being a king, when you can be a god? God meaning one of the greatest to ever live in your field of expertise. Last night, Kevin Durant became one, and I hope you will too. Thanks for reading!-Charity Israel




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Single Women, Can We Talk???

Hey ladies, I hope you are having a lovely day. I come in peace. 😇 Yesterday, I wrote a blog to the Single Men enlightening them on how to keep the interest of a Good woman. I think it is only fair that I write to the women who desire to keep a good man’s interest. This blog comes from a place of both love and lovebeachesfrustration because I am tired of my girlfriends being single; and I am tired of them doing stupid things to lose quality men. I get nauseated every time I hear women say, “There are no good men out there.” Earth to ladies: DO NOT DISCREDIT  ALL MEN BASED ON THE KIND OF MEN YOU KEEP CHOOSING. If you were more selective instead of desperate, men of substance would make themselves available to you; but I digress. Here are five things that will keep him interested:

  1. Go out. I have lost count of how many women I have met who desire a relationship but refuse to go out. 👀 Ladies for 99.99% of us, Prince Charming is not going to show up at our doorsteps to whisk us away on his horse. You have to be visible for him to see you, GET OUT OF THE HOUSE!!! I am not suggesting go to a bar, but frequent the places that reflect you and what you enjoy doing. If you meet someone while enjoying what you love to do, there will not be any pressure to stop doing it. This also gives you a topic of discussion once he decides to call. #Outthehousecampaign2015
  2. Be Feminine. Being a lady is a lost art in our society. Women have become so bent on proving they are equal to men that we have lost the “sugar, spice, and all things nice that little girls are made of.”  NEWSFLASH: SMILING WON’T KILL YOU AND BEING KIND WON’T HURT YOU. A good man adores the soft and feminine things about a woman.  He appreciates when we are gentle, reserve, and soft spoken in his presence. A good man will honor and love the feminine side of you. He will not abuse it. He does not see it as weakness. It is simply one of the many reasons why he chooses to protect, honor, and respect you. #hisflower
  3. Have Goals/Hobbies. A good man likes a woman about her business. He is not insecure requiring you to be at his beckoning call. He enjoys the fact you have interest outside of him. He also will be an accountability partner as it pertains to achieving your goals. He will not accept complacency or mediocrity from you because your success becomes his success. Your looks may attract him, but your ambition will keep. #findsomethingtodo
  4. Allow him to lead. A good man takes pride in being the source all of you need. Give him access to the areas you could use his help, guidance, and expertise. He lives to show you that he can be trusted. He takes delight in knowing he can soothe your worries and calm your fears. Your independence will keep you alone. If he has proven himself capable of leading you guys, LET HIM OR LOSE HIM. #TeamInterdependent
  5. Keep his secrets. Ladies his fears, failures, and insecurities are not topics for public discussion among friends. He has entrusted you with the deepest part of his heart, KEEP YOUR MOUTH CLOSED. His secrets should NEVER be used as the closing statement to win an argument. Throw his past or insecurities up too many times, and you will trade in his trust for a stroke to your ego. He will not stay long because part of him respecting you is measured by how much he trust you. A good man values loyalty, and your inability to keep secrets proves YOU ARE NOT LOYAL. #caseclosed

It is my hope that this was received in love. Honestly, I am tired of good people being single for silly reasons. Ladies it is not enough that we desire love, but we must know how to respond to it when it finds us.  Start going out again!  Take pride in being a woman by sharing your softer side with him. Before he makes his arrival, have some other interest and goals outside of Love. Do not be afraid to follow the leader. He has your best interest at heart, trust him. Last but not least, let his secrets and insecurities find refuge in you. Practice silence when it comes to the intimate things of your relationship. All the best to each of you!- Charity Israel



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Single Men, Can We Talk???

Happy couple holding handsI come in peace!!! This blog is not an attempt to rip you a new one. It is me offering you insight into finding and keeping  a virtuous woman. Let me be clear, I am NOT trying to help you “smash and pass,” but I am trying to help you secure something solid. If you are not interested in a woman of substance and have an obsession with the ratchet, STOP READING! If you are a man who enjoys living the lies you have created, I CANNOT HELP YOU! If you are good man looking for your female counterpart, this may help in the process of dating quality women:

  1. Choose the right bait. When I talk to good single guys, they often complain about ending up with the same kind of woman. I ask a few questions, only to discover they are using the same methods to pick and keep a woman.  I am no fisherman; but I know the same bait used to catch a Catfish will NOT help you succeed in catching a Swordfish. You must learn what appeals to the kind of woman you truly desire. Then you have to wait until she takes the bait. The bait is that thing that let her knows you were listening. In other words, what you used on most women will NOT work on a virtuous woman. She knows the game, and she will shut it and you down QUICKLY!!!
  2. Be yourself. If a good woman has given you access to her life, give her the gift of authenticity. The best thing you can give her is yourself. The size of your wallet is nice, but a woman of substance is more concerned about your character. She is able to take care of herself. Allow her to meet the real you.
  3. Have goals. A good woman takes pride in encouraging her mate to greatness. If you do not have anything for her to assist you in achieving, she will NOT entertain you long. She is an encourager, and you must supply her with something that feeds that part of her.
  4. Be honest. A Virtuous woman is gracious, but she despises a liar. Your honesty tells her that you trust her. You do not have to fear sharing your past with her. She keeps your secrets to herself because she values loyalty. She wants to know you; and she understands who you were helped shape who you are. Once you recognize she is different from anyone you have encountered, TREAT HER THAT WAY. Loving her is easy because you know she means you no harm.
  5. Be a confident leader. A good woman loathes an indecisive, incompetent man. She is a leader, and she only follows those she trust. You must prove she can let her guard down and follow your guidance. If your words are followed up by your actions, the guard comes down quickly. If you say more than you actually do, there will be an Early Dismissal. She does not have the time to entertain inconsistency in a leader. If you do not know what to do, ASK FOR HELP. This speaks volumes of your humility and leadership ability. She prefers you to ask for help rather than allow your pride to keep both of you lost or ignorant. Keeping your word and asking for help when it is needed will assure her that you are one worth following.

It is my hope that you find one or more of these things useful to your journey. I am aware that some of you desire something real, and I am praying that you find it. Good women do exist, but they are not the easiest to find. Enjoy the process of finding her! In the meantime, continue to improve who you are and what you have to offer.- Charity Israel

P.S. Ladies are not fish. 😜




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